Mail order bride look

Otsustan siis mina täna kleidi selga panna. Võõpasin huuled roosaks, panin põsepuna palgele ja isegi juuksed kammisin ära.  

Jalutame Idaga tänaval. Üks mees peatab meid.  "Kas sa oled venelanna?" küsib ta. 

"Ei," vastan mina. "Ma olen Eestist." Mis on "Estland" jääb talle arusaamatuks. Ma lepin sellega, et olen Islandilt.

Mees naeratab laia naeratust ja lisab siis: "Aah, aga ma teadsin kohe, et sa pole norrakas!"

Ma ei tea, kas see oli kompliment või nägin ma nii välja nagu mail order bride. Härra Trond tuli ju ka Eesti asjade poodi omale potentsiaalset pruuti otsima, mäletate? Juba siis mõtlesin ma, et kas ma näen meili teel tellitava pruudi moodi välja. 

Aga samas ei saa öelda, et see tänane mees kõige adekvaatsem oleks olnud. Idal on seljas roosad püksid, pitsilised sokid, roosad ketsid, lilleline pluus ja roosa müts. Ometigi küsis see mees Idalt: "Miks sa süles oled? Sa oled ju juba suur mees." (Ah, mida?)  Ja leidis siis, et ta peab Idat ilmselgelt kallistama. Haaras meilt ümber kinni ja kukkus keset tänavat kallistama. Weird...really weird...

I decided to put on a dress today, wear a bit of make up  and even brushed my hair. We were walking along the street when a man stopped me. "Are you from Russia?" he asked. 

"No," I answered, "I am from Estonia." He had no idea what it was and after third attempt to say "Estland" very clearly, we agreed that I am from Iceland.

"Ahhh,but I knew at once you are not a Norwegian," he smiled to me. Was that a compliment (we all know that Russian women are considered to be beautiful) or did I look like a mail order bride? After all, Mr.Trond also came to my shop of Estonian THINGS to find a partner. Already then I felt  like a mail order bride... (because when from Eastern Europe some people still think that we all come to Scandinavia for husband-hunting)

But.

It was not all. Ida was wearing pink pants, lace socks, pink sneakers, a shirt with flowers and a pink hat. "Why are you not walking on your own?" he asked Ida. "You're a big man!" (What? A little boy? Dressed like this? Really?) And he suddenly felt like hugging Ida, he crabbed us and didn't let go. Just continued hugging. Weird...very weird..

Anyway. If you want to get the mail order bride look, I can help you. Apparently.